A time of blessing....

A couple of weeks ago at Sunday lunch my dad asked if we were all in a time of blessing or hardship in our lives...... It created quite the discussion and I thought about it all week. Corey and I feel like we are in a time of blessing. But, all I could think about that week were my times of hardship. Then I started to think about what the Lord had taught me through these trials and I was amazed at the different things I had learned.


One of my favorite songs goes like this..."oh no He never let go, through the fire and through the storms..oh no he never let go in every high and every low, oh no He never let go, Lord you never let go of me." What a truth and a testament to the Awesome love of our savior. I was overwhelmed as I thought about the goodness of my Father. He has taught me so much through the hard times. He has also been a constant strength. As Rob mentioned yesterday "his rod and his staff will comfort me" It is amazing how the Lord has been a comfort and guide when I have felt so all alone. I am thankful for his amazing love and Grace.


I am in a time of blessing so, it would not be right to be blessed and not share my thankfulness. I was also reminded of this when I saw a church sign that read.."Are you blessed? Then be Thankful!" It was so to the point and it struck me. Why am I so quick to point out the bad and not be thankful for the good. I am sure this is something that most people struggle with. I have decided to start a Thankful journal. I did this a few years back and it was amazing how quickly my attitude changed in life. The Lord has blessed me immensely and it is my responsibility to be thankful for the blessings that he has given me. SO.......Thanks and to God be the glory.

Going through the motions

When I was a Freshman in college, we did Two From Galilee at our church. One of the songs was called "going through the motions" It was talking about going through the motions of life. You do the same thing day in and day out. Sometimes I feel that way with my marriage. I love my hubby very much. We have a fantastic relationship. But, sometimes I feel like we see each other in passing throughout the day. We say "Hi" and plenty of "I love yous." We ask about each others day and we work together to take care of Mayer. But, we just go through the motions most days.


I know that most of it is because we have a new baby and this is a crazy time of year for Corey and his work. But, I don't want to wake up 20 years from now and still be going through the motions. When my kiddos are gone I don't want to look over at Corey and feel like he is a stranger. This is the part about parenthood and marriage that is so difficult sometimes. There are responsibilities that must be done. But, some days I just want to stay in bed cuddled up next to Corey all day. I want to stay up late watching movies. I want to have a fun romantic weekend away like we used to. I want to have a surprise lunch date. I know that with children come responsibility but sometimes I just don't want to be responsible!! :) Is that awful !!?? Is it OK to take a break from motherhood and focus on my marriage. I know that it is but sometimes you feel a little guilty. Oh well, I guess I will have to get over the guilt and schedule a little Corey and Me time before too long!! No more going through the motions starting today!!! I think I am going to send my hubby a sweet little love you e-mail. :)

Life as I know it....

So I haven't blogged or done anything in almost two years. I actually did not even realize that my blog was being shown until recently. So, I am conquering my fear and saying; "here it goes" This is life as I know it....

Our household has changed dramatically in the past year. Not only have we added a new member but, I have also started working part-time and Corey is busy with his last year of Grad school.. PRAISE THE LORD!!!

Having a child is the most life-changing experience that I have gone through. (side note..I was saved at the age of 5 so, I was not really living a life of sin then, Well except for the occasional biting of friends and I did get in trouble once for saying a bad word I had heard from the TV. But, I don't remember it being a life changing moment...back to the point..) I remember the day I found out I was pregnant. It was the most surreal moment of my life. I remember the feeling of fear and excitement. I remember crying while cuddling up on the couch with Corey and praying for this precious child. I remember the day we found out it was a boy!! I remember the pain of child birth and the joy I felt the minute I saw his beautiful face and big fat cheeks. I remember seeing Corey's tears as we both sat there praying again for this baby boy the Lord gave us. I remember the fear I felt when I left the hospital. I remember the hours of sleep that I lost. :) I remember the amazing amount of love I felt for Corey. I remember staring at Mayer while he slept in his crib, praying that the Lord would keep him safe and healthy. I remember the words that Rob prayed when he was dedicated, praying that Mayer would love the Lord and come to know him at an early age. Being a mommy is amazing and amazingly tough all at the same time. The amount of energy and time that you put into your children is crazy. But, the love and joy that you feel when they cuddle up close, or say "mama," or reach for you is great. I love my sweet little family. I call Corey and Mayer "my boys," and I wouldn't trade them for anything in the world.

I guess my life is crazy, and busy, and tiring. But, I have a life full of joy and love. We may not have as many things as we did before. We may not have as much money. We may not have as much free time. But Life as I know it is wonderful.

"Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus."

1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

Devotion

I read this today. It was such a wonderful reminder of God's protection for me. It was very encouraging to me this morning.


Faith is built upon trust. God wants us to trust Him in the trials of life! Even when we do not understand what is happening or can explain the circumstances. Even when nothing makes sense and everything seems wrong. God did not come to eliminate storms. God came to fill each storm with His presence and power.(I really liked that part) It is easy to trust Him when the seas are calm and the skies are clear! However, the strength of our faith is measured in the midst of a raging storm! A crisis always reveals what is really inside! What life does to us depends on what life finds in us! Faith is a deliberate choice to believe God, to walk through our fear, knowing we can trust Him every step of the way.

end of the year

I love being a teacher but, it is so difficult this time of year. I feel like I could scream. I have so much paperwork and testing to get done. I am about ready to pull out my hair!! It drives me crazy. I just thought I would complain!!

1 year

June will be an anniversary that nobody knows about. June will mark the year anniversary of the most difficult year of my life. I will not say that it has been the worst. However, there were many moments where I cried myself to sleep alone in the closet so nobody would hear. I also would sneak downstairs and cry on the sofa hiding my cries in a pillow. I will not say that it has been the best. However, there were many moments of pure joy this year. I love my husband more than I have ever loved anyone in my life. I have had times of fellowship with friends and family and I have never felt more loved and cared for. This year has been difficult and lonely but, I have had a friend that sticks closer than a brother. He is the only one who knows what I have gone through. He is the only one that has walked beside me during this painful and difficult year. He is the only one that I have cried out to. I must admit that there have been times where I have asked why and times when I have questioned. But, God is good even during the difficult moments. I am thankful for my year anniversary. In some ways I am happy that I have spent this difficult year alone. I have learned to depend on God and only God. He was the only one I could talk to and depend on. Thank you Lord for trials.

Devotions 2

This is from my devotions this morning!! They were so good and I just wanted to remind myself of this. I have had two great days in a row. God is so good!!


I truly believe many people are living stress-filled lives because they have never sought and discovered God's plan and are trapped in jobs and careers that simply do not fit. Every day, they feel like the proverbial round peg being jammed into a square hole. What does fit is God's plan. In Psalm 23:3, David writes, “He leads me in paths of righteousness”. “Righteousness” simply means “right things”. The Shepherd has a plan for His sheep. Unfortunately, so does everyone else. The difference is that God’s plan is filled with the “right things” He shaped and created us to do while the agendas of others service their own purpose instead of God’s. God empowers us to do what He shaped and gifted us to do. However, when we step into our own agenda or a plan created by anyone else, we are stepping into and relying upon our frail, limited strength. Soon, we will be empty and stress will flood in, filling the emptiness with anxiety and tension.

Don’t waste another day just doing the “next” thing. Take a long, hard look at your work, your job, and your agenda to make sure you are in the right place, doing what you were created to do in this world.